Bruised
by sunnyskye
Summary: Bella's life isn't as perfect as it looks... After an 'accident' she insists on going to live with Charlie. Edward/Bella. Warning: Abuse of all kinds and possible lemons later.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

This was the type of life anyone would dream of. That is if you are an average seventeen year old girl in a high school. I had the best friends, they were all gorgeous, and apart from the occasional binge drink, they were a good group of friends. I had an amazing mother and step-dad, he loved me like his own. Best of all I was dating the star of the football team. He was everything a girl could dream of, big, strong, handsome, showing me off like I was a real catch.

Truth is, that was just what showed on the outside. I had so many 'best friends' I couldn't count them on one hand. They were all shallow and had no personality. After high school I doubt I would talk to them again. My mom and step dad were constantly busy with there 'work'. Not really... my step-dad is a minor league baseball player and has to travel a lot, often leaving me home alone by myself. Which is where the third part of my perfect life comes in.

I was now routinely getting abused by my boyfriend James.

_And there was nothing I could do about it._

**Authors Note: **

**This is the first 'Fanfiction' I've ever posted, it feels weird even calling it that because I've read some amazing stories on here and I'm afraid I won't compair. This is obviously very short, but don't worry. It's just the prologue, chapters will be _much_ longer if I get reviews and people want me to continue....**

**I hope someone.. anyone likes it!  
**


	2. Chapter 1: First Slap

**Chapter One**

"_You change for two reasons, either you learn enough that you want to, _

_or you've been hurt enough that you have to."_

*

My phone started ringing at 6:00, just like I expected it to. My mom wouldn't want me to be late to school now, would she?

"Isabella are you up!?" my mother nearly hollered into the phone. I could hear she was kind of distracted in the background. Filing, phones ringing, typing on her laptop. Always the busy one.

"Yeah, I am now, thanks mom," I replied groggily but as kindly as I could.

"Okay good," she replied, trying to sound sweet but I knew she was busy. She didn't intentionally put me behind her new husband. "Me and Phil should be home tonight, if not by tomorrow afternoon."

"Okay, cool," I said, looking around my room trying to find jeans to wear today, "I'll make sure the dishwashers unloaded and the kitchens picked up."

"Oh, thank you sweetie," my mom said, and I could tell she was smiling. "I'm sorry we've been so busy lately...I swear when I get home this weekend we'll do something. Just us girls." That's the thing, I wanted to say, you've been busy for the past seven months... and while that may not be a lot of time in the actual world, she missed almost my whole summer vacation and the end of my sophomore year. She was missing out on my highschool experience, the kinds that needed a mom there...

"I understand mom," even though I didn't, "Don't worry." I didn't want to make my mom feel like a bad mom... she was trying. She was following the second love of her life around, and Phil and her were working hard to try to get me the things I needed...

But I felt like half the time- especially now a days- all I needed was a mom.

"Thanks dear," she paused for a second, "I'm really sorry hon... my boss is calling me, I will talk to you tomorrow, Isabella." My mom was the only one who called me Isabella... it made me think she still did love me as much as she said she did.

"Okay, I love you mom..."

"I love you too, bye hon."

And she hung up.

I sighed, picking up jeans I already wore this week. I didn't have the spirit in me to care anymore... I put them on, found a baggy sweatshirt, and long sleeve shirt just in case I got cold and headed to the bathroom, afraid of what I would find. I looked in the mirror.

Oh no...

James had never given me a bruise on my face before. Never. I had never deserved it... but last night... he gave me one right below my left cheek bone. It wasn't un-cover-up-able. I just didn't want any questions... didn't want to make him more mad. It isn't like people hadn't asked me before, they had. But since I'm so naturally clumsy its easy to pass it off as a "Oh, I just fell down the stairs!" "I ran into a door." "I tripped." or my favorite "I got hit with a volleyball in gym."

I've had exactly a year to become an expert at coming up with excuses. I've been dating James since the end of my freshman year, and trust me, in the beginning I never would have saw this coming. He really did start off as the perfect boyfriend- not that I had any experience. He opened doors for me, paid for everything under the sun that I wanted, surprised me, was so friendly and nice to my mom and Phil- they absolutely loved him, from day one until now- he got to know my best friends, and was the stud on the football team. Everything that you could ever want in a boyfriend, he had.

The first slap I didn't even see coming. It was only four months after we started dating. I remember exactly what we were arguing about, exactly where we were, even the approximate time. He was mad that I went to the football after party by myself, instead of waiting forty minutes for him to get out of the locker room to drive me himself. We were in his car, he was driving me home, so it had to be around midnight.

"_Is, I don't understand why you didn't just wait for me," he said getting really frustrated. _

"_I don't understand what the big deal is, I left with all my girlfriends," I said rasing my voice._

"_All of your slutty girlfriends who have no boyfriends?" he said, now raising his voice. _

"_They may be slutty but I am nothing like them! What does it honestly matter!?" I screeched. He was making accusations for no apparent reason, and I wanted to know why._

"_It matters because I say it does," he growled._

"_That's a real good excuse, 'It matters because I-'" he slapped me square across the face, middle of my sentence. I didn't see his hand coming, but I did feel the immediate burn after. I brought my hand up to my face shaking.... I didn't know what to say. What to do. I had never been afraid of a single person before, but right then I wanted to jump out of the car. We were parked by this point, but I was too afraid to look at him but he was breathing as if he was horrified of what he had just done._

"_I- I," I started to stammer. _

"_I don't know where that came from... I'm so sorry Is...Is I'm so sorry..." he practically pleaded with me. I didn't know what to do... I felt frozen in time._

And I wish I could go back and freeze it. Because I'm too deep now to just get out of the car and not care.

*

For the first couple months, it honestly wasn't bad. Even for the next four months. The first night after James slapped me, he didn't lay a hand on me for those several months. But I did notice a change after that night.

Before, he was always so sweet and innocent. We were in love after only a couple months of our relationship, because it was so perfect, with no expectations of one and other. It was my first real relationship, and only his second. I had never done anything before, from holding hands to sex, it was all so new to me. He was the complete gentleman, at first.

After that night though, he got a lot more snippy. Frustrated with me, because I would make some silly comment or not think before I spoke. He would get mad how we couldn't be together as much as he wanted to. When I would talk to other guys he would get insanely jealous, claiming that I was flirting and how could I do this to him? He started getting rougher, trying to get me to go farther than I wanted to sexually. I was still a virgin and only sixteen. Although I wasn't very religious I still held onto my virtue like it was something special, and me and James had only been dating for a little over four months at this point.

The worst wasn't even the sexual part at first, it was the fact that I started to believe things he would say.

"You're so stupid, Is, how could you even think that is a rational thought!?"

"What were you thinking, are you stupid!?"

"You're so fucking stupid..."

Over and over again, these things were said to me daily. It became sort of a routine. I did have a 4.0 GPA, I used to be on the newspaper staff... I didn't think I was stupid. But even after only a couple times, hearing that from someone you love, it starts to sink in. You start to believe it, and become it. My grades didn't start dropping immediately, no it took almost half a year for me to get lower than C's... but I started to stress out much more about school than I normally did. I started to think my friends, parents and teachers thought I was stupid. I didn't like raising my hand anymore, or participating in talk, afraid I would make some stupid error and make them mad...

James would get mad at me for every little thing. I make him a grilled cheese, its too burnt. I pick him up from football, I was five minutes late. I get new perfume, I smell like shit.

Nothing was ever right. Everything I did was _always_ wrong. At this point I knew something in our relationship was messed up, or in trouble, evidently, but every relationship has its weaknesses. I figured it was just because he was really stressed out about football.

After football season, it just got worse. That was when it all really started.

"_Why can you not hangout today?" he questioned as we were both leaving school. I was tired, I needed a nap or something. Every night I was having horrific dreams. They were all of me being killed. _

"_Rene wants to take me out to dinner," I lied. I should of known he would see past my lies, I never was good at telling them. _

"_Oh, okay," it sounded like he was sarcastically mocking me, and I was scared of that. _

_When I got home, I was alone of course. Phil and Rene were in Florida for at least a couple more days, so I just ran to the nearest, comfy looking piece of furniture, and just crashed. I fell asleep within seconds of my head touching the couch pillow. It didn't even cross my mind that I forgot to lock the door..._

_I woke up to a shaking, very disoriented, and scared automatically. _

"_Out to dinner, huh?" James screamed at me. _

"_James, I'm sorry-," _

"_You're sorry, you're fucking SORRY?" He yelled, I wasn't sure what he wanted._

"_I was just so tired..." _

"_Tired of what, ME?!" He slapped me again, what was more sad than this, was the fact that I could barely feel the sting anymore... my cheek was getting used to being slapped, used to the pain. It hardly registered anymore. _

"_No, James, never of yo-," I started but his hands went around my throat. This was the worst it had ever gotten before. _

"_Bull. Shit." he said them distinctly as two words, spitting at me as he said them. I was struggling for air, I couldn't breathe. I tried to wheeze out, please, but it just sounded like gurgled junk. "Want to know what I'm tired of!?" he shook me as he said this, making my neck snap back and forth with all the force he was using. _

"_I'm sick of my girlfriend, lying to me, thinking that I won't find out. I'm sick of her bull shit flirting with other guys and her stupid ass fucking comments. I'm sick of the fact that she will not ever, ever, fucking put out for ME! And I'm most sick of her living!" _

_I started to see spots, I didn't want to die at this point, not yet! I started to flail my arms, trying miserably to get away from my boyfriend. I used my feet, which in the end were useless. _

"_Oh, you like that, you like it?!" and he increased his pressure on my neck. NO! I screamed, I HATE YOU! _

_I started to die... slowly, for the first time, and for many more to come, I thought I was going to. Right before he took his hands off my neck, and started kissing everywhere all around. _

"_I'm sorry, Is," he said, although he didn't sound quite as sorry as he used to. "I swear I didn't mean to..." I was gasping for air, at the same time trying to inconspicuously push him off of me. I was disgusted with myself, but more over the fact that I felt, and still feel like I deserve this. I deserve to almost die, and have that taken away from me. I deserve this boyfriend, and nothing better..._

"Isabella?" my moms voice pulled me out of my flashback.

"Yes?" I said, looking up from my homework at the kitchen counter, not noticing my eyes were glazed over with tears.

"Oh, hon, what's wrong?" she asked. She looked genuinely concerned, although she really had no clue.

"Nothing, nothing. Just some boyfriend issues..." I said very much understating it.

"Oh... well James is a good man, maybe you should invite him over," my mom asked innocently. She had no idea... "Phil and I are going out for dinner for a little bit, you could use the company... You always seem so alone, Is..."

"Yeah... that's a good idea. Maybe," I said, regretting I'd even said maybe to inviting him over.

"Here give me your phone, I'll call that handsome guy over here," she said giggling. _No._

"Uh... he's probably busy, or something, I don't want to bug him," I said sheepishly. Mom... please, I begged in my head. But she had no idea, I couldn't blame her... this was my fault. I'd gotten myself into this mess, but there was no way I could get myself out now.

"Oh, please. Hon, he loves you so much. I can see it in his eyes. He'd drop anything to get to see you!" she smiled warmly. She actually believed this. I sighed, and just handed her my phone. Like myself, my mom was very stubborn when she wanted something. And now, was one of those times.

She flipped open my cheap phone, and dialed. I felt my breath hitch, I was already scared and I couldn't even hear him yet.

"Hello? Oh, hi James, this is Rene!" she said bubbly as ever, "Listen me and Phil are going out for the night, and Is told me that you guys are having some issues, I really think she could use the company, she seems sad over this little rough patch!"

_Oh. My. God. I was dead. _

Don't talk. Don't tell. That was his policy.

"Oh great! Okay, yep! Anytime would be good for her! Thank you, James," my mom smiled. "See you later!"

"See, that wasn't so bad, now was it, Is?!" she half asked, giving me back my phone. "PHIL LETS GO!" she yelled up the stairs, making her way to the door. "You kids have fun tonight," she said to me.

"Yeah... We'll try," I could hear the doubt in my own voice.

Thirty minutes later I heard my front door slam.

"Is, Is, where are you my little darling," I heard him cackle, at his playful ways.

"I'm in the living room..." I stated, trying to sound strong about it. I would rather him know where I was, then play his game of cat and mouse. I didn't even hear his footsteps when he walked in, I saw him first.

"Hello, Is," he didn't sound mad... if anything, he sounded... seductive. I don't know what one I was more afraid of.

"Hi," I said, trying not to have my voice shake. It made him excited when I was scared.

He was over to me in three long strides, touching, caressing my face, in a way that disgusted me.

"You look so beautiful tonight," he said smirking, while his finger tips grazed over my lips.

"Th-Thank you," I couldn't help but stutter.

"So you told your mom, pretty girl?" he shook his head while he said this.

"No... no I didn't," I was not involuntarily shaking. I shook my head, trying to get the point across. I WAS TOO AFRAID TO OPEN MY MOUTH TO ANYONE!

"Naughty, naughty, girl... should we teach you a lesson?" he said, more than questioned me. I knew I didn't have a say in anything, anyways. He started kissing down my neck, giving me goose bumps. Not out of pleasure, but of sheer terror of where this was leading.

"No, James. Please," I begged. I knew then that for the first time, I was going to be raped for my boyfriend. It would not be the last time.

I don't know what brought it on, I would much rather have the rage, and fury then this. His grimy hands touching me, undressing me. Sucking on my earlobe, trying to get me to enjoy this. But nothing could make me, which then brought on his crazy side. And it just happened.

But I deserved this.

And I always would.


	3. Chapter 2: The Reality of Beauty

**Chapter 2**

"_When a girl ceases to blush, _

_she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty."_

*

My mother was oblivious to a lot of things, but she was not stupid. She saw the changes. How I tried so hard to look pretty and get ready every morning for him, yet something else was off. I lost weight, my jeans were hanging off of me, my shirts involuntarily baggy, my hair was thinner, even my cheeks seemed thinner. I didn't have to worry about a random blush occurring, I didn't have any real emotions left. I went through the motions. Even though my mother was gone for four out of the seven days of the week, she noticed this. It makes me wonder about all my 'friends' who saw me every day, yet didn't say anything. It only took her a couple times of seeing me like this to speak up.

"Hon, are you doing okay?" she asked, I was yet again doing homework on the kitchen counter.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I replied as emotionally as I could. Even my voice was starting to sound like it was part of this uniform.

"You look so tired..." my mom sounded a little bit hopeless.

"I am, its just my math classes," I was a very bad liar to being with. But now, it seemed necessary. I didn't want to make my mom worried and I was getting a little more experienced with James around. _If I didn't say the answer he liked... _

"Okay, if you say so..." Rene still sounded worried. As if she could fix this. I was the only one who could. And I realized I was going to have to, and very soon. But when was very soon? We had been dating now for six months, and I hadn't stopped anything. The beatings were getting worse and worse every time, he raped me on routine, he controlled every aspect of my life. I knew I wasn't in love. But if I wasn't... why couldn't I leave?

_I was driving us to his favorite restaurant in downtown Phoenix. We were just casually talking, like we used to... he even complimented me once or twice. I don't know what his deal was, four months of horrible treatment. And then this. It was almost all worth it. Just this twenty minute drive to his favorite restaurant. It was peaceful and perfect. I wish I could ingrain this in my brain, and make it my default image of James. _

_His perfect smile, twinkling blue eyes and such sincerity it killed me to know that it wouldn't last. _

_And it didn't. _

_The dinner was fine, he had to be civilized in public, but I was scared for our car ride back home. And what would happen after. _

"_You little slut," was the first thing he said to me when we got in the car. The tension had been building throughout all of dinner, you could have cut it with a knife. _

"_I'm sorry, James," I replied, reversing the car, and getting back onto the highway. _

"_Do you even know what you fucking did?" he asked. With all honesty I did not... I shook my head no and that set him off tonight. "I take you to our favorite place! And you have the decency to flirt, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, with our god damn waiter! YOU ARE MINE!" _

_He was livid. It didn't stop there. He screamed at me for all my wrongs, in the past two days. I couldn't help it I started to cry. I was so ashamed of myself. That I let it get this horrible. This man that everyone thought was so perfect, was degrading me to something lower than a person. I was scared, lonely and thoroughly depressed. The whole time he was ranting and slamming his fists on the doors, I was just sobbing to myself silently. _

"_Why the FUCK are you crying?" he screamed at me. I turned just the slightest bit to see him. The rage in his eyes were something I have never seen before. I had NEVER seen this side of him. Not even the times he had strangled me, kicked me, slapped me, raped me. _

_Never. _

_And that scared me the most. I wasn't sure what to say._

"_Are you scared?" he mocked in a pitiful voice that sounded so meak and mean at the same time. "Huh?!" he said a little louder. I didn't know what to say. I think he would punish me for either anser. "ARE YOU FUCKING SCARED!?" he screamed so loud, as he physically pushed me, causing the car to swerve severely. I skimmed another car, he grabbed the wheel, but I had a feeling it wasn't to help and sure enough..._

_I remember tumbling, crashing, a loud crushing sound. _

_Him say, "Bitch."_

_And I was out. _

I woke up, and my eyes were wet with tears. I didn't know what was really going on, but I remember bawling still. I was so disoriented and scared. I couldn't remember what happened really, but I know I was scared, and I wanted to leave. I was scared he was here. Waiting for me.

"Belly?" I heard my mom from somewhere to the right of me. I jumped involuntarily. "Oh Bells, oh my!" she came over and hugged me so tightly it hurt. I cried out in surprise, and fear.

Everything felt like him. No one had touched me besides him for the past couple months. It was burning... burning.

"Mom," I croaked out. I couldn't do this... I couldn't stay here. "Mom..." I tried again. But I couldn't get the words to come out.

"I'm so sorry baby, so sorry," I wasn't sure what she was apologizing for at the time, I just know that I knew what context I wanted them to be in. I wanted to tell her, everything. And maybe I could, but not now. Not now...

She felt sorry because James was in critical condition. She didn't give me details about him, but she told me about me. I only had two broken ribs, a broken hand and intense bruising on the left side of my face, the side James had slammed into my window. She would never hopefully know that though... I knew I couldn't tell her now for sure...

This was however, a time I needed to tell her something else. I could no longer stay in Phoenix. I needed to get out. Trying to break up with James was out of the question. He would kill me. He was going to kill me over not being scared. I can't imagine what he would do if I tried to end it.

"Mom... can I please go stay with Charlie?" I sounded so strangled, even to my own ears.

My mom looked as shocked as I felt. It was the only alternative I could think of. It was far away, in Washington. James couldn't reach me, nobody could. I would be safe.

It took my mom a lot of convincing, she had no clue why I suddenly wanted to go live with my father, who I hadn't seen in two years. I wasn't sure why his name popped into my head then either. I had to come up with multiple reasons as to why I should. She could travel freely with Phil, not bothering to come home ever if she wanted was the main one she latched onto as if it were a life preserver.

Not a week later I was on a plane ride up to Forks, Washington to live with my father.

*

The plane ride didn't last more than a couple hours, although with all the thoughts racing through my mind it was hard to tell. The good thing was, I was thinking more of the future, although it was inevitable to completely block out the past. The past was the exact reason why I was on this plane right now, possibly making the best or worst decision of my life.

A couple days after I got out of the hospital, I went right back to school. My mom wasn't entirely convinced yet about me going to Charile's, she wanted to see how I acted when I got back to school and see if this was a shock reaction of some kind. I didn't like not being busy, and those couple days in the hospital made me think more than I had wanted to about past occurrences. Going back wasn't such a good plan either, I found out. People- my friends namely- seemed to know what had happened, although that was impossible. I was fairly sure I was keeping up my profile, playing bruises off as my clumsiness. The looks they gave me though, hinted to something more. As if this whole time they had known. And how disgusted they were that I had let this happen to myself. If anything it was my personality that had changed so dramatically that was getting me in trouble. Especially now...

I consider myself a strong person. Being with a boyfriend who beats you for half of a year, takes a toll on you. It warps your mind; trying to make it think that it's not as bad as it really is. I'm waiting for it to catch up with me, and after the accident I think it did. I cried constantly, on the way to school, sometimes in the bathroom after I made myself puke because of how disgusted I was with myself, on the way home from school, all night until I fell asleep... Even then it would come to haunt me. I still felt it wasn't enough. Like half of what he had done to me hadn't sunk in yet. Every day was worse and worse. _Slaps, punches, kicks, cutting..._

James wasn't back at school yet, I don't know if he was in the hospital still or just skipping to avoid me... I wasn't sure. I, however, did not mind one bit. It was hard enough to talk to people now a days, alone, but having him there, hovering over my shoulder, watching my every move... it was eery. I couldn't concentrate. Even then, I would be looking over my shoulder, jumping when I felt someone brush my shoulder while passing me in the hallway.

I looked out the window, gazing at the clouds, wondering when we were going to be there, like a child. I was also wondering how this situation would work out. I had not seen Charlie in almost two years, and like me he was not particularly talkative. Which is why my mom and I worked so well together. She was bubbly and charming, while my dad and I, especially now, were going to be awkward. I wondered how I would fit in, and if people at Forks High School would think I was a freak; actually, I didn't even have to wonder about that, I knew they would.

I started dozing off, the kind where your head bobs up and down but you try to resist the temptation to really fall asleep. It mostly happens in school. Since the first time James has slapped me, I have had bad dreams. I was cursed with insomnia, which wasn't hard to cover up with makeup and coffee every morning, but the dreams seemed to get worse and worse every night. The sad thing was, a lot of them weren't dreams... they were my punishments more severe. James at one point started to cut me; not badly, just on my hip bones, and just to draw blood. I dreamt about this most often, it getting worse, to the point of him killing me. Which is why in the car the day of the accident, I think he was capable of it. No... I know he was. His image, his face, his punishments, would always be there to haunt me. To watch my every move... he would always be apart of me now.

Before I knew it, they announced we had landed and I was shuffled along with the rest of the passengers, in a daze, not even realizing my dad was just a mere few feet in front of me until he said my name.

"Bells?" my dad asked, more than said. Did I really look that different?

"Hi dad," I said, giving him a small smile. It was the least I could do. I subconsciously grabbed my hair, just wanting to have something to hold onto.

"Hi, uh, wow, you've changed a lot since I've last seen you," he said, wary at first but trying to be convincing to not only myself, but to him as well. I also noticed his voice laced with a sort of comic tone. I just nodded and tried my hardest to smile, hoping it didn't come across as a grimace or something worse.

"Well kiddo, lets go get your stuff and get out of here," he said trying to be genuinely warm and optimistic about this whole thing. I take it Rene didn't fully describe what she was sending here exactly.

Charlie wasn't a man of many words, especially when it came to talking about feelings. That's why when he said something, you tended to listen closer than if someone random was talking. The fact that he was trying to lighten this mood that somehow got set the moment he saw me, was the closest definition to sweet I could ever think of. I like my dad, didn't really have a way with words, so I couldn't conjure up a way to thank him, so most of the trip was silence. I didn't really know how to talk to anyone anymore...

I hadn't been to Charlie's house in over two years, and let me tell you, I could even remember that nothing has changed since then anyways. Same white exterior and cabin like feel inside. Cozy, just how my mom had wanted it all those years ago. He didn't change it for her.

Charlie lead me to my room, which was exactly the same as I remember that also. Same little girl wallpaper, medium size bed and table. Basic, simple. It was just what I needed for now. No reminders of the past and no references to the future.

When all my bags were carried up I sighed loudly and sat on my bed.

My dad smiled slightly, looking at me once again, as if trying to figure out this was really me. He gave me a piece of paper and as I looked down on it, it looked like a map of some sort. I realized it was a map of Forks high school.

"School starts Tuesday for you, I figured you'd want a day off." I took a deep gulp. A new school, where I didn't know anyone. It's not like I didn't figure this out before I rashly decided to come here, it was just sinking in how I'd have to try and act normal and make new friends.

"Th-Thank you," I pushed out from my throat that seemed to constrict. Charlie just nodded, and told me to settle in and come downstairs if I got hungry. All I could think about was school though. Even people in Phoenix treated me like slime that walked the earth, the way I deserved to be treated. And they knew of my situation... I tried to block these images out of my head. After all this is a new town, with new beginnings...

Then I came back to reality.

I rolled my eyes in my head, who would ever want to be friends with me?


	4. Chapter 3: Only One Day

**Chapter Three  
**

_If there is light in the soul, _

_there will be beauty in the person._

*

My dad had a very big surprise for me the day before I went to school. Notice I said big, not necessarily... nice. I mean I know it was coming from the heart, and he had all good intentions, but it was already hard starting at a new high school. Adding to that though, was a huge, ugly, orange truck that looked like it was from the pre-historic ages. But don't get me wrong, I liked it. There was something about it that made me feel safe, and it wasn't the rusty old seat belt. I'm not sure, but having my first car sure was liberating. Even if it was this truck that got me to school the next day.

As I parked in the Forks high school parking lot, I thought I was going to start hyperventilating. I pressed my forehead to the steering wheel, telling myself to stop being so stupid about this. You've been through much worse, I reminded myself. I think I could pretty much say that for the rest of my life. I hope nothing would get worse than that...

After what seemed to be hours, took a deep breath and I opened my truck door. It was horrific enough that the door squeaked open for more than mere seconds, but falling on my ass the first step on this campus wasn't so reassuring. It was a sign, I was sure of it. The ground was cold and wet, as was all of Forks. I sat there stunned for a moment or two before hauling myself up and shutting the stupid truck door, trying not to attract more attention than I had already.

_Great start._

I looked down at my map and started walking in the direction, to where I presumed was the main office, where I could pick up my schedule. I wasn't necessarily paying attention to people passing me by; I was scared, I just wanted to get to my destination. I started to notice how many people were around me and their proximity. I didn't used to be a jumpy person but having James as a boyfriend made you realize these things. I noticed the skeptical stares of the people, making my hands shake even more. I clenched my jaw together to keep my teeth from chattering anymore, not only from the cold, but also from the fear that was instilled in me.

From no where, I felt a hand on my arm. It felt clammy and wrong and it made me up and yelp a little. I dropped the map of the school, put my hand to my heart, which was beating much too fast. It was random moments like these that I wondered if I would die this way- of fear.

"Woah, my bad!" a boy said as I bent over to get my map. I tried to control my shaking as I stood back up. _Control yourself Bella, he is not James. _

"No, it's fine," I tried to reassure myself more than him.

"How about I make it up to you by being your tour guide for the day?" the guy said more than asked me. He said it brightly, as if that would be the highlight of his life. I was a little confused however, that he knew I was new. Was it that obvious?

"You are Isabella, right?" he asked suddenly, as if afraid he had gotten it wrong.

"Uh... yes," I said a little perplexed further, as to how he knew my name...?

"Everyone is talking about you, you're Chief Swan's daughter after all," he replied to my internal question. Ah... Charlie. Of course he would tell people I was coming to visit him. I just nodded, showing my understanding, I hoped.

"Oh, yeah, my name is Eric by the way," he said putting his hand out for me to shake it, which seemed a little formal . I didn't want to be rude, but I wasn't sure what to do. I wasn't comfortable and I started to squirm. I think he got the hint and put his arm down. He didn't try to touch me again, but he was friendly none the less. I was very surprised, and thankful. Although too scared to say much. Eric did creep me out a little bit, the way he stared at me was starting to give me maybe a wrong impression. He showed me to the office, where I got my schedule, then to my first hour class.

"Uh, so this is it," he said smiling as I walked in to my class.

"Yes, thank you," was all I could manage to barely whisper, turning around. Not two steps and two seconds after, I was two inches in front of another boy. This one was taller, and a little pudgier. I backed four steps away quickly, almost tripping on my own two feet yet again. I was startled... I wonder if that would ever really stop or change.

"Hi there," he said beaming at me as if I was a big teady bear he just won at a fair, "I'm Mike Newton." Who would have known people in Forks were more friendly then people in Phoenix, despite the sun and rain differences.

"I'm Bella," I introduced myself. My voice still sounded timid. I mentally reminded myself that I would have to try and change that, I needed to stick up for myself here.

Mike, although friendly, was quite different from Eric. He was much more outgoing, and was trying to openly flirt. He had the looks that you would picture as the average jock and seemed to know everyone. We had several classes together, so he walked me to them. No matter how friendly he was being, I was glad to finally get to lunch and have more people to surround us.

I naturally sat with Mike, I didn't know anyone else, and met all of his friends. Eric was at the table and was making me feel very uncomfortable for some reason, as he was glaring at me. There were a ton of girls talking about pointless things. They reminded me a lot of my fake friends from Phoenix. There was one nice girl, Angela, who really seemed, well real. It was as if she could sense something was off about me but didn't want to press me for information unlike the other girls. I sort of felt like I was at boot camp.

Right when I was thinking I needed a distraction, one walked through the lunch doors. There was five of them, and the first thing I noticed, was they were all the most gorgeous people I had ever seen. They all had the same pale skin, all different arrays of hair colors, but even from this distance I could see something very clearly. Golden, honey colored eyes. They made there way over to their seats, gliding more than walking, all so graceful, I didn't even want to be in the same room as them.

One of the girls, Jennifer I think it was, or Jessica maybe, caught me ogling them, embarrassingly enough.

"The Cullen's are social outcasts, don't even think about it," she rolling her eyes at me. I looked down from staring at anyone. I was embarrassed to even be here.

Lunch passed without much more consequence. I looked up at the Cullens a couple more times, just admiring their beauty. Jessica filled me in on more information about them. I created nick names in my head for them, just for personal reasons. I knew I would never even have the chance to talk to them, but it helped pass time time. Pixie was Alice, the girl with spikey black hair. She was cute and tiny, reminding me of Tinkerbell. Blondie was Rosalie, the girl who just looked like a bitch, but I couldn't help admiring. Shrek was Emmet, he was big and brawny, but still looked like he had a nice side. Casper was Jasper, because he seemed like he wanted to disappear. And last but not least was the most gorgeous of them all, I simply called him Edward. I couldn't think of a perfect enough name to describe him. Whenever I would sneak a glance up at him, he would be looking at me too. But it was a confused look, as if he was trying to figure out a hard calculus problem... which only confused me more thoroughly.

I of course kept these names in my head, and they never ever would get out. I didn't speak anymore for the rest of lunch and that seemed to go well for me. I finally made it to Biology, my last class of the day. Mike of course escorted me because we did have the class together, of course.

Mike was talking about something I couldn't concentrate on when we walked through the door, the first thing I noticed was Edward. The next thing I noticed was how my teacher, Mr. Banner, told me to go sit by him and that we were lab partners.

The last thing I noticed before internally breaking down, was that his face was almost identical to James's face when he wanted to kill me.

*****

I walked through my front door from my first day of school; I was shaking, both from the cold and from pure fear. Would I ever escape his face? Would he ever fully leave me alone? I ascended the stairs to my bedroom wanting to just be alone. Charlie wasn't home yet but I wasn't going to start crying in his living room. It didn't seem right. I pushed through my door, shut it and melodramatically threw myself on the bed. The pillows and bedspread encompassed me, and I wish they could just swallow me into the earth and never spit me back out.

I checked my cell phone, not expecting anything of course, and dialed my moms number. I don't know what compelled me to do it-actually I do- but I don't know what part of me expected her to answer.

"Hey, this is Rene. Please leave me a message after the beep and I'll get back to you! Thanks!" beep.

"Hi mom... it's me..." I paused and thought about what I even called her for. "I, uhm..." I stopped and just hung up. There was no point anymore. The damage was done. I couldn't be fixed or helped. I was beyond that. I felt the sudden urge to do something I hadn't done in a while. It was the same feeling that kept me hating myself; only after would I have some piece of sanity.

I went to the little bathroom that Charlie and me shared and just stared at the toilet. Just the image of it could almost make me throw up at first sight. I knew this wasn't right. I never imagined me to be the type of girl to do this, if there was a certain type. I just knew how it made me feel after. Rejuvenated, in control and like I was real. So I shoved my finger down my throat and saw the contents of whatever I ate at lunch come up.

_I hadn't seen someone stare at me like that since him. Possessive, like he wanted to harm me. No... he wanted to kill me. _

I shoved my finger down again, my eyes swelling up with tears.

_Biology passed slowly, it never would end. His eyes were piercing through me, charcoal black. No matter how gorgeous, I knew they were dangerous. _

I threw my head back from the toilet, completely disgusted with myself. I wasn't crying, but I couldn't stop the dry heaves.

_I took one feeble glance to look at his angels face, and was faced surely with death. I turned away and started whimpering. What did I do to him? I know what I did to James. I was a bad girlfriend. But I had never even seen this boy until today... I pushed my hair over my face so he couldn't see me cowering. I tried to just take deep breaths. I didn't want him to hear though, so this was difficult. My breathing hitched unnaturally a couple of times, and I knew he could hear it. He was shifting around, like he couldn't get comfortable, and craned himself as far away from me as humanly possible. As the expression goes, you could cut the tension with a knife. Until there was only five minutes left of class, we didn't say anything. Then I turned yet again to meet his face. _

_I silently whispered, "I'm sorry." And the bell rang. He barely registered what I had said before he bolted at miraculous speed, to get the hell out of there. _

I just sat there on the floor for a little bit, thinking about my encounter with Edward, and shuddered even more than I already was with the dry heaves. I had hoped things would be different here. I hoped that people wouldn't know I had been abused, or think that I deserved that.

I was wrong.

Not even a week into my new life, and I had been proved wrong. I would always be the lowest excuse of a human.

I heard my dad come through the front door. I hadn't realized how long I had been sitting on the bathroom floor, I quickly jumped up and brushed my teeth. I looked at myself in the mirror, no longer surprised by the zombie that stared back at me. I rubbed my hands across my eyes and tried to look more alive.

It didn't really work.

Charlie hollered up the stairs about ordering a pizza. I told him I already ate and to just order for one. He seemed to believe me without questions, so I went in my room and started my homework.

I was meticulous about getting my homework done. It may be the only thing I had going for me. Of course if I had friends, this would probably be different. Early into my homework, I started dozing off, and eventually fell asleep.

The next day, he was gone. I didn't notice until lunch, but when I looked over at the lunch table where his siblings were, he was not sitting there.

I mindlessly talked with Mike, or tried to. I knew that even at my best effort sentences tended to be shorter that five words, so with me being distracted I'm not sure how much company I was. And why he was so persistent was beyond me. It scared me to some extent, that Mike would care so much to get to know me... but to me he was kind of innocent.

"So Isabella, I was wondering..." Mike started. I automatically reeled my attention back to him, instead of looking over every couple seconds to see if maybe.... Edward had accompanied his brothers and sisters yet.

"Yes," I said quietly, taking a bite of an apple.

"If maybe this weekend you would like to go to the movies?" he asked it so easily, but yet I could hear the strain in his voice, curious for my answer. I quickly looked down, scared of what to say. Would he be mad at me if I refused? Should I just go...? He seemed harmless enough, but a tiny voice in the back of my head was sending off warning signals.

"Um... Mike, I'm not sure... I mean," I stuttered along, trying to find the right words to let him down with.

"Oh, Bella," he said putting his arm around my lunch chair, I instantly leaned away, on pure instinct. He noticed this but it didn't make him move his arm.

"It's fine, if you're busy, maybe another time," he said grinning as a bell rang.

I was anxious to get to Biology, to see if he truly was gone. Mike of course accompanied me to the class, as I was beginning to see would probably become a routine.

I for some reason, felt my heart drop when I saw his desk was empty.

I sighed and moved forward, sitting by myself, in the same silence I was the day before.

Days and days went by, and he didn't show up. Almost two weeks, without his presence and I was starting to feel... something resembling comfortable. I could carry on a semi-normal conversation. Semi-normal. I felt safest around a girl named Angela. She was pure and one of the most genuine people I had ever met. She didn't push me to talk, on the other hand other people at our table, Jessica, Lauren and Mike, were a whole other story. They didn't have any sense of boundaries.

'Why did you move here?' was a question I got from those three almost right from the get-go... I instantly clammed up and started rocking back and forth. From then on, I think the whole table realized what a freak I was and avoided asking any pre-Forks questions. Many things remained the same, and I wondered if I ever would really heal. I screamed at my dreams relentlessly, every night they came back, almost as vivid as before, sometimes even more so.

Finally, after two weeks of not seeing him, Edward was back. I walked through the cafeteria doors with Jessica talking my head off, and I looked over at his table. Expecting to see nothing different. _But he was there. _

It was strange, but when I saw him, I felt as if a huge weight was lifted off my chest. It wasn't logical, and was very stupid, I had no reason why I felt this way. I was terrified, yet relieved? It was so complicated I couldn't help but scrunch my face up in wonder. I sat down at our table, trying to keep my breathing under control, but it was so hard to do. I was more scared to enter the Biology room, more scared from anything that I had been in a long time.

Mike still walked to Biology with me, today I couldn't concentrate on even one word he was saying.

Edward was already sitting in his seat when I walked in. I tried my hardest to be casual and walk up to the table as if it was no big deal. But my head was screaming with thoughts of running as fast as my non-athletic legs would carry me, away from here, and away from him. They also were pulling me toward the desk, gravitating me toward him.

I sat in my seat, taking one last breath, preparing myself for the worst. For him to stare at me like that again... for him to remind me of... _him_.

"Hello, I'm sorry to have not introduced myself yet, my name is Edward Cullen," I heard him say. It was so clear and velvety, I was almost afraid to talk. My voice would pale in comparison.

I looked over at him, he was smiling lightly. His eyes were the second thing I noticed. They were not the deep brown, almost black I had previously seen. They were golden, and warm. They were comforting... Not at all the face I remember from two weeks ago.

"Hi," I started, trying not to stare intently on his perfect white teeth.... or his perfect anything, "Uh... I'm Bella."

He nodded his head, still smiling, a light laugh at his lips.

This was going to be the second longest class period I had with him, yet.


	5. Chapter 4: Change

**Chapter Four  
**

_"Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are."_

*

Mr. Banner was explaining to our class a project that we were going to be doing over the next couple of weeks. It was experiments with plants and such, we would need to work outside of class. And we would need to work with our lab partners.

"So Bella," Edward Cullen turned to me, after Mr. Banner completed his explanation of our project, "What brings you to Forks?" It was a simple enough question, and much different coming from him, than from when Jessica and Mike asked me the first day they met me. It sounded genuinely curious, and I was scared of that. It was also so light-hearted and casual, I wasn't used to any of these things, and I wasn't sure how to sound like a human being, to be completely honest.

"It's sort of a complicated story," I replied, not looking up at him and remained writing down the assignment that was on the board.

"I understand complicated," he replied, and I could tell he was still staring at me as intently as he had that first day. "Try me."

I hesitated before I looked up into his eyes and then back down again, being too afraid to make eye contact with his piercing golden eyes.

"Um… My mom remarried, and…" I couldn't come up with a lie fast enough, "And I just needed a change." I brilliantly finished with. A very open, mysterious answer…

"A change of what?" he asked, catching on to my generalness, how I wish he wouldn't have.

"Um," I started again.

"The weather?" he asked. He almost got me to laugh, I smiled, which was close enough.

"No, definitely not," I said, the smile still lightly on my lips. He mumbled something under his breath, and I looked up, wondering what he said.

"You don't like the cold?" he covered up quickly, more quickly then I would imagine.

"No, no cold, or rain, or snow. The weather was fine," I said… I figured I couldn't lie about that, I wore long sleeves in Phoenix, so being in Forks where it constantly rained, was even more extremes.

"Not the weather, and you liked your step-dad?" he observed somehow.

"Yes, Phil was nice," I replied like a dead person. "Him and my mom were just busy a lot of the time… My mom worried a lot. So I figured if she didn't have me to worry about, she could go about her life."

This sentence was the most I'd said to anyone, and even though it wasn't a complete lie, I was shocked at how much I had just told this… guy, so much about me when I barely knew him. Until ten minutes ago, he reminded me of James…

I glanced at him and he seemed pretty surprised too.

"That is pretty selfless of you," he said, a corner of his lip starting to go up in a smile.

"No," I replied, looking down again. I had never been described as selfless before, and I knew I didn't deserve that compliment.

"No? You move to somewhere cold, rainy and snowy, so your mom and step dad can live without any worries?" he questioned what I had just said to him, and the way he said it, did make me sound pretty selfless. He also didn't know the whole story.

"What are you hiding from me Isabella?" he whispered in a soothing question, getting closer to me. He didn't mean for it to sound scary, or threatening, and it didn't. But I had a flashback in that tiny instant, and I instantly went into a panic. I immediately felt uncomfortable and wanted to shrink inside myself. I shied away from him, trying to make my move inconspicuous as possible, but he noticed, and backed away immediately. The bell rang at that moment, and I was saved. I nearly jumped out of my seat, running into Mike.

"Woahhh there girl!" Mike exclaimed, and I felt his arm around my waste. I felt bile rising up, and I half moaned. I pushed him off me and moved as fast as my two shaky feet would allow me, to my truck. I was breathing heavily by the time I got into the cab, and had to rest my head on the steering wheel so I wouldn't feel as dizzy.

"Who the fuck are you texting!" James screamed at me, as my phone vibrated in my purse.

"I don't know, James!" I shook, I wasn't texting anyone before he came over, I don't know who would be texting me now on their own free will.

"ISABELLA WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU HIDING?!" he screamed, as I tried to get my phone out and check it. "I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME! BUT YOU'RE FUCKING HIDING THINGS FROM ME?!" He started to shake me and took my phone.

"My best friend? That's a fucking low blow, Is." I had no idea what James was talking about, but my ears started to ring.

"James, I have no idea…"

"'Bella, thanks for the help the other day in English cutie;)'," James read off for

me. I had no idea what Laurent was talking about, I let him see a couple of my vocab terms, and he was nice, but I had never talked to him beyond that classroom. But I guess that was too much…

Before anything brutal happened, I blacked out.

My breathing evened out as I started the truck.

Bella, you're not in Phoenix anymore. James is nowhere close to you. YOU'RE FINE!

I was trying to convince myself of all these things, when I didn't know if they were true. I was so sick of living in fear of my every move, but I didn't know how NOT to. James haunted my every nightmare, I had no choice but to fear everything, but today I had my first glimpse of hope. While it was a stretch, and I was afraid that developing hope meant getting hurt. It wasn't like I could get hurt any more than I already was. I was hoping, and praying with everything in me that this glimmer I saw, was true.

Edward Cullen was a good person, and he was nothing like James.

Even after my little episode, I was kind of excited to wake up tomorrow and go to biology.

Because at this point, I had no idea what to expect.

*

I woke up the next morning at six AM. By choice. I knew I didn't have to, no one would care if I wore baggy clothes or didn't wear makeup. But there was a difference about me waking up at six on this particular day. I wanted to.

I don't know what compelled me, but I had a scary feeling in the pit of my stomach it had something to do with the bronze haired angel I had a dream about last night.

I took a shower, blow dried my hair and put some makeup on. I used brown eye liner and mascara, keeping it minimal. It wasn't the way James liked it, he liked it black and dark. I liked it this way more.

I went downstairs, having the same feeling I had the night before, before I went to bed. Praying that the hope wouldn't go away.

"Hey kiddo," Charlie said as I was rummaging through the cupboards. I jumped slightly, I hadn't heard him come in and sighed to myself trying to calm down.

"Hi," I replied, "do you want some cereal?" I asked, attempting to be polite. Charlie and I hadn't talked much since I arrived a couple of weeks ago. Simple hello, good bye and goodnights were enough. Back before James I couldn't remember if it was ever different between us. We were both very similar in our introverted ways. Back then, I think I used to be able to handle small talk... God I was a freak.

"How has school been?" Charlie asked me cautiously. I paused for a moment, pondering.

"It's been all right..." I tried to think of some lies, "I've made a couple friends." Lame. I knew it was stupid of me to tell these lies, but I did know it was something he wanted to hear.

"Oh really?" he did sound someone excited at the thought, but very wary at the same time.

"Well, they're more of lunch buddies than anything," I said, trying to be honest. I didn't want to give him false hope, and he just nodded in understanding, being indifferent. We continued to eat in silence until we said our morning farewells, and I jumped in the clunker.

It was raining out, freezing before it hit the ground making it very slippery. I was staring to fear the walk up the slippery steps to school, deciding I would wait by my car until all the students left the parking lot. I parked as far away as I could from all the cars, just in case I fell simply getting out of my truck, which would be plenty more embarrassing than going up the steps inside. I felt a little bit of a blush creep into my cheeks, which I wasn't used to. I wasn't used to having emotions come to the surface as often, I touched my cheek just to feel the heat. I shook my head before I read too much into this and opened my door. I did a quick 360 making sure no one was watching before I exited. I hastily hopped to the ground, as quick as an uncoordinated person can, feeling very successful on the landing.

_Landed on my feet, not my ass, great start to the day._

I slammed the door, smiling quietly to myself when I caught my reflection in my window. What an odd sight... me... smiling? First blushing, than smiling? While I was glimpsing in the window, the smile quickly vanished from my face as I saw someone else from a distance in the window. I could sense it was him, he was watching me from across the parking lot. I looked over my shoulder just to make sure. Even from where I was standing, I could see and feel the way his gold eyes smothered me. I quickly turned back to lock my car, trying to forget the way he was staring, trying to forget what it reminded me of.

In the split second I turned around I faintly heard tires screeching on dry pavement. I looked up in my window seeing a huge can coming right toward me. It all happened so fast as I waited for the van to crush me, but nothing came. I felt an arm wrap around my waste and felt myself fall. I hit my head on some part of my truck and yelped, but other than that I felt no pain. I heard a loud crunching noise and was hyper aware of the arm around my waste. I felt it relax and the commotion stopped.

"Bella?" a very concerned velvet voice questioned. I opened my eyes slightly and edward was much closer then I anticipated. I automatically tried to move away, hitting my head again on the truck. I yelped- AGAIN- and wanted to move. I struggled to get away from him, but he wouldn't let go.

"_You can't leave me! You can't ever fucking leave me!" _

The words still echoed in my mind, but another voice broke through.

"Bella, it's okay. It's just me," I could faintly hear, but I felt like I was still under.

Calm yourself down, I tried telling myself. This is Edward, HE JUST SAVED YOUR LIFE!

My shallow breathing was evening out and I opened my eyes I didn't realize I had shut.

"Edward?" I asked, slightly confused, now the only question was, "How... how did you..." I trailed off looking at a dent in the van that should have squashed me. I looked back at him my eyes mirroring his wide ones. I was very aware of his proximity to myself in that instant, or maybe it was because he took his free hand and touched my cheek. I cringed away, acting on auto pilot.

"We need to get you to a hosipital," he said calmly, as I noticed noises, most likely people, coming toward us. He was avoiding my question and I didn't understand why.

"I don't want to go," was the only reply I had, getting sort of drowsy, but fighting it. "I'm fine!" He smirked slightly.

"Did you know that's the most commonly used lie?" he stated rather then asked me. He started to stand up, bringing me with him. My head hurt as we stood up, and I felt a little wobbly, his arm was still around me for support but all I could think about was how to get it off of me...

"I can walk by myself," I said trying to push him away as I looked in the van. Tyler was passed out on the steering wheel and people were suddenly all around us, calling 911, ambulance lights flashing everywhere and suddenly, I was in one with Edward. As I sat there, all I could think about was this whole situation was impossible.

I should be dead.

I turned my head to the right where Edward was sitting, with a look I can imagine to be described as confused; it only got more so when he noticed my stare and looked back with sheer agony and complication written on his face. I had so many questions, and needed so many answers.

He leaned over, slowly, his scent intoxicating me and whispered, "Later."

I looked at him shocked.

"Promise?" I asked. I don't know what compelled me to know the answer to this mystery, I just knew I had to know. I needed to. I knew from the first day I saw Edward Cullen, something was off. Something was different. Now my suspicions were confirmed. I had no idea what to think and I could draw no conclusions. I was bewildered and more curious then I should have been. I wasn't being cautious and I didn't understand why.

I just stared back at him waiting for an answer. He looked me straight in the eye.

"I promise."


	6. Chapter 5: The Start of Something

**Chapter Five**

_"We tell lies when we are afraid.. afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger."_

_*  
_

Hospitals reminded me of one thing; sadness. I suppose you could think exactly the opposite, imagine happiness, the joy of babies being born, the miracle of life. It was a beautiful thing I've heard. For me though, no. After being in the hospital for more broken bones I could count, more concussions I can't remember, accidents that left me nearly dead, I had a bit of a skewed impression. I thought of the families I saw that hold on to one and other, clinging to the thought of happy news. I think of my grandma who died when I was twelve; we were never particularly close, but my mom was so upset after she died. The other looming images in my head of a hospital are the ones of the last time I was in one, which is reason enough to hate them. I guess if I was more ingenious though, I never would have ended up in half the situations that landed me in the hospital in the first place.

"Isabella?" I heard a voice bringing me out of my very deep thoughts. It took me a second to realize I wasn't in the old Phoenix hospital and the nurse who took my temperature and inspected me was gone, replaced by a very handsome doctor.

"Bella," I self consciously corrected, blinking a few times.

"Bella," the doctor repeated, a warm tone to his voice, making me want to trust him. Was he even old enough to be a doctor?!

"I'm Doctor Carlisle Cullen," he introduced himself, staring at me making sure this sunk in. Of course this incredibly attractive doctor would be Edwards dad... Dr. Cullen looked down at the charts in his hand, that were undoubtedly mine.

"Ok, I'm just going to take your blood pressure really quick, if you could roll up your sleeve." I rolled up my sleeve, self-conscious of the scars you could see in some places, but only to my eye. What I did notice, and I knew for sure he would also, was a large bruise in the middle of my forearm. I forgot about that one as my mind reeled at the sight.

"Did you get that today?" Dr. Cullen asked, genuinely curious, but even I could tell it was older. It was yellowing around the edges, no longer the black and blue it surely was weeks ago.

"Uh, no... I got it weeks ago," I tried to convince him as much as myself, my mind was scrambling, trying to get something in order, "Is Charlie here?" I asked frantically.

"Yes he is, but there is something I want to discuss with you before he gets back..." Dr. Cullen trailed off, writing something about my blood pressure down, and taking off the wrap.

"Ok..." I said, trying to prepare myself.

"Something is very concerning to me Bella," Dr. Cullen paused, "Your body weight is extremely low, I don't know how the doctors back in Phoenix didn't catch it or say anything. I've read up, and you've had many injuries, particularly in the past year, but there is nothing indicating extreme weight loss."

"I've always been skinny," I replied simply, trying not to sound too scared.

"Bella," Dr. Cullen warned me with his voice, but in a subtle way, "You weigh 97 pounds, you're 5'6. It's not a natural thing. And I'm betting to guess that bruise wasn't either."

"You think I did it to myself!?" I asked disbelievingly.

"No, I don't think that entirely. I'm not going to jump to any conclusions, I just want you to take better care of yourself," he said sitting in his desk chair, swiveling it around, grabbing something from his desk and then turning back around, handing me a notebook, "I want you to write down for two weeks everything you eat. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. I want you to keep a dietary list of everything. Every day."

I just looked at him, shocked. No one in Phoenix had ever said anything about my weight or noticed any odd bruises.

"And don't lie," he warned, "If you lose any more weight or don't gain any I will have to get your father involved." That struck a cord, I simply nodded and took the book from him.

"Okay.... thanks," I replied, even though I was scared. The last thing I could control, was gone. "Will you relay that to Edward too?" I asked bravely, I didn't know where his name came from in my mind, but it popped out before I could resist.

"May I ask why?" Dr. Cullen asked, smiling, writing one last thing on my chart.

"He saved me today," I replied simply. There wasn't a beat of silence, but I could feel the tension between us, and his need to escape.

"Yes, you were indeed, very lucky," he said smiling still, but it looked a bit forced. "Now if you'll excuse me I have anther patient to go see. Have a good day Bella, you're free to go as long as you get a good nights sleep." I nodded, stunned by his composure and grace; much like his sons. Just as Dr. Cullen exited, Charlie came in.

"Bella, thank God you're all right," my dad said, not urgently or frantically, just how Charlie would say it.

"Yeah, the doctor said I could go home as long as I rest up," I replied, smiling slightly. He nodded, understanding also. Shrilly, Charlie's phone went off making me jump a little. He gave me a confused look, but put his finger up to me, indicating he'd be just a minute and answered it.

"Chief Swan." He listened for a moment and I could hear someone on the other line, from where I was sitting.

I didn't ease drop, but by the way his face drained of color in those moments, it wasn't good. He made a few short answers and snapped his phone shut.

"There's been a stabbing homicide a few blocks down and they need everyone right away..." he trailed off. I didn't know what to expect but I filled in the gap.

"You don't need to drive me home, I can find a ride," I offered, knowing I definitely would not. I tried to wrack my brain of exactly how to get home from here, when I heard the voice of an angel speak up.

"I could take her home," I whipped my head around to see Edward. I winced a little at the pain of my neck twisting so fast, but quickly recovered. He walked over to t he doctors desk and grabbed a few papers, casually. "Sorry to interrupt, my dad forgot some things."

"Oh, you're Carlisles son?" Charlie said cautiously.

"Yes, sir, that's me. Nice to meet you Chief Swan, I'm Edward Cullen," he said flawlessly, of course, "Bella and I have biology together," he briefly explained, and thank heavens because I couldn't have made it sound so casual yet, as if we knew each other. Edward Cullen had a way with words...

"He also saved my life today," I sort of mumbled but loud enough for Charlie to hear.

"Well, thank you," Charlie mumbled too, "And if you're sure it wouldn't be too much of a burden..."

My dad didn't have a way with words, just like me.

"Not a burden at all," Edward said, smiling, and as I looked down, I swear he was smiling at me.

*

"You really don't have to drive me home," I said quietly as we walked out to his car. I felt bad, he surely didn't live by Charlie, and I knew it was out of his way. As we made our way across the parking lot of the hospital, and he automatically unlocked the door to a very nice and spendy car, I couldn't have felt worse... I felt dirty just looking at it.

"I know, but how would you get home then?" he asked, his voice lighter then I had ever heard it. He opened my door first, and I got inside his nice, shiny, silver Volvo.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as he glided around the front of the car, getting into the drivers seat. I was pretty sure I would not have a panic attack, but I hadn't been in this enclosed of a space with a boy in a long time... and I wasn't sure I liked it.

I couldn't think of what to say, so I just blurted out the first thing that came to my mind.

"Are you going to tell me how you stopped the van?" I asked. I held my breath.

He sighed heavily, "Why are you so interested in that?"

"I want to know why I'm still alive," I replied, looking out the window.

"Do you wish you weren't?" he asked cooly, but I could hear the harshness in the underlying tones.

"No, of course not," I said sounding firmer than I intended.

"Then you should just thank me and get over this," he said pleased by my answer.

"I don't know if I can," I said, "I want to know."

I don't know what it was about him that made me generally curious, but I wasn't going to just look over this as an every day occurrence.

"I want to know a few things myself," he countered, "but I'm not sure you'll answer my questions either, which isn't fair is it?"

"Hasn't anyone told you life isn't fair?" I closed my eyes trying to block out the horrific memories that came along with that line, what made me get up and live every day in Phoenix.

"Yes, I believe someone has..." he trailed off in a whisper I could barely hear. I glanced over at him for the first time since we got in the car, and just stared.

He was simply, the most handsome man I had ever seen. His unnaturally bronzed colored hair, his perfect complection, his topaz colored eyes. He also had a look about him, that made me think he had seen more than his years. And as I stared at him, I knew I wanted to take whatever sorrow had been etched in his voice moments ago, and make it disappear.

"How about we play twenty-one questions?" I asked, it had been a long time since I had played this game, and it seemed random of me to bring it up now, but I think he needed random at the moment. Here I go again, conforming to whatever someone needs me to be a the moment.

"Twenty-one questions, huh?" he asked, raising an eyebrow in my direction, turning to look at me as I nodded because I couldn't get any words out with his golden eyes smothering me. "Okay, you go first."

* * *

**Please review!!!**


	7. Chapter 6: Drawing Parallels

**Chapter 6**

_The man that deserves you the most_

_is the man that thinks he doesn't. _

*

"So tell me about your siblings," I started, hesitating.

"That's not really a question," he said putting his car in park and turning it off in my driveway. I knew he was teasing, but I couldn't help but blush.

"I'm sorry..."

"You don't have apologize," he said looking at me questionably and then decided to answer me, "We're all adopted, my parents died when I was very young."

"I'm sorry... I didn't know," I looked down, having a minor flashback, but trying to block it out and concentrate on the present, where I felt like the biggest idiot on the planet.

"It's fine, I was very young, I barely remember them," he said shrugging.

"So are you the oldest?" I asked.

"Hey, no cheating!" he said flashing me a smile, "It's my turn."

His smile was blinding, and I couldn't think of anything, my head feeling full of air and I was suddenly aware of how little I had been eating lately. I just nodded, and looked at my hands, afraid of what he would ask. This could be a very dangerous game, and in my sporadic thinking had failed to think of that.

"You like to read?" he stated more than asked. I was very taken aback by this, not expecting something so easy for me to talk about.

"Yes, I love it," I said, nodding my head and smiling lightly.

"Do you have any particular favorites?"

"I thought you said no cheating!" I said before answering.

"That's hardly cheating, it is a follow up question!" he defended himself as I looked up.

"So was my sibling question," I pointed out.

"Not even close, we went from me being adopted to the sequence of age!" he replied cooly, I looked out him without blinking before I saw the defeat in his eyes.

"Fine, I'm in the middle. Rosalie and Emmet are older, Jasper and Alice are around the same age, I consider them younger," he paused for just a brief moment before we got to what he wanted to ask, God knows why, "Now, your favorites."

"Everything," I replied shyly, "Anything to get me in a different universe."

"Shakespear to King?" I just nodded, unable to explain how I felt about reading. It was the one thing that I could always count on to distract me.

"Shakespear is actually one of my favorites," I added. He nodded and I was reminded it was my turn.

"What are you listening to?" I reached for the button on his stereo. It was a simple question, you could tell a lot about a person by what they were listening to. Edward reached for the stereo at the same time as me and accidentally hit my hand. I was shocked by the coldness and just in general how I felt an instant spark, almost like a jolt go through my body.

I involuntarily flinched away, like I always do with anyone, and he stared at me. I looked down and started playing with my hands. He didn't say anything and instead stared fidgeting with some buttons and the music started playing. It wasn't the average rap music anyone would expect to come blaring from the speakers. Instead a calming, beautiful melody danced across to my ears. I recognized it immediately, my mom on rare cleaning days would play this. She said it calmed her and helped her concentrate more than normal. I could almost smell the Windex and toilet bowl cleaner now as a natural reaction to hearing the music.

"Debussy," I whispered. His head snapped to look over at me, his eyes wide and disbelieving. He had always been good at covering up reactions, if he had any around me, wearing a mask of sorts. Not right now though, he looked shocked.

"Yes... How did you know that?" I looked at him again, braver than before.

"My mom used to listen to it when she cleaned. It was one of my favorites," I explained.

"You miss her don't you?" he asked quietly, looking in my eyes as if searching for something. His stare was so intense I had to concentrate so I could stare at him and not look away like I so desperately wanted to.

"Yes, and no. I miss her, not so much Phoenix," I replied carefully.

"But you don't like the rain?" he asked sounding confused. I remembered the conversation we had in Biology, me saying I hated the cold. I realized he was cheating, that it was my turn to ask him a question, but something inside me pushed another answer forward.

"No, I don't."

"Then why don't you like Phoenix?" he questioned. I didn't know how to answer that question without him knowing about my past. He was getting too close for comfort and I didn't want him to. It wasn't Phoenix I didn't like, it was the people or more specifically the person who had hated me so much I started to hate myself. The person that made me doubt anyone could love me, the person who gave me both physical and emotional scars that I would have forever.

That was why I didn't like Phoenix. It was a scared place for me forever.

"It's my turn," I stopped him there.

"Okay," was all Edward said seeming to know I couldn't answer the question, or just not caring. "Your turn."

In the short thirty minutes Edward and I had played twenty-one questions in his car I found out a lot about him, without making myself vulnerable by exposing too much of myself.

I found out his favorite color was a warm chocolate brown and he in return found out mine was a golden honey. When he asked why though I blushed and said I didn't know. I was relieved when he didn't press me for answers, and he never did.

He eventually told me about his family, he said he was closest with his sister Alice, he said since they were very close in age they went through a lot of the same things. I felt as if there was more store behind this, but I didn't press him like he didn't press me. I didn't even realize that twenty-one questions was turning into just a normal conversation.

Before this night I would have imagined Edward Cullen as very reserved, I'm pretty sure we hadn't talked for over a minute before this, but as I suggested I had to go finish my homework, noticing the sun was setting I had a totally different image of him. I wondered if he had one of me too... I was scared to wonder.

"Speaking of homework, when are we going to start our biology project?" he asked before I left.

"Oh... um..." I stopped, unsure of what to say. I hadn't given it any thought at all.

"Would you like to come over tomorrow and start it?" he asked.

"I think that would work," I said warily.

"If not, I'm free this weekend," he offered. I could tell he was unsure about my uncertainty. Just two minutes ago we had conversation flowing freely, so comfortable. I couldn't believe how comfortable...

"No, tomorrow would work," I said trying to convince myself, everything would be fine.

"Okay, good," he said smiling hesitantly, "Then you'll get to meet the crazy family I've been telling you about all night." I looked at him with sheer terror on my face. He wanted me to meet his family? What did he just say!?

"You were asking about them all night, it's not a date or anything!" he quickly said trying to erase what ever was on my face a moment ago.

I nodded, and I was more relaxed.

"It should be fine," I answered, "I will see you tomorrow?" It came out as a wary question, and I didn't know why. I shouldn't care if he was at school or not, or if I never saw him again at all for that matter. But I did, I wanted to know he was going to be at school tomorrow.

"Yes, I will be at school," he answered my unasked question, and I wonder why that relieved me a bit. He smiled gently and I didn't know if I was imagining it but there was some other emotion behind his eyes. His gorgeous eyes....

"Okay, goodnight Edward," I said, trying my hardest to sound confident. I reached for the door handle.

"Goodnight, Isabella," he paused before he said my name. The texture of his voice wrapped around my name making it sound beautiful. As if he believed that...

I nodded, and got out. All the way up my driveway I wanted to believe that this wasn't just me. That he had felt the spark tonight too, that he thought I was beautiful the way his voice made it sound. I didn't look back but I knew he waited until I got inside and closed the door before leaving.

Him leaving made my self doubt return. I couldn't believe that, it would be stupid of me to even think anything of the sort. Edward was a gorgeously handsome man, and I was nothing. I was supposed to be keeping a diary of my eating habits for crying out loud! I pushed the thoughts of Edward aside and climbed the stairs, homework and a restless night awaiting me.

*

At least his family will be home, I tried to convince myself as I walked into school, preoccupied with the thought that six hours from now, I would be going with Edward to his house. I started to backtrack in my thoughts. What if that wasn't such a good thing... his family being there?

_We had been dating for three months. James had already met my mom and Phil and I suggested I meet his parents. I didn't know how they had never been mentioned in conversations and I felt liek this was serious enough for me to be introduced by now. _

"_I don't know if that's a good idea," he said when I asked him about it._

"_Oh, come on!" I replied, giggling, taking his arm while walking out of school one afternoon. I kept pushing until he revealed to me what I thought the main problem was._

"_Is, my mom is dead." He said it so sure and steady, without a shred of remorse. I knew there was an emotion though, I could hear it laced with his toughness. _

"_Oh James..." I paused looking at our hands interwoven, "I'm so sorry." _

"_I knew you'd say that," he said rasing his voice and pulling his hand away from mine. "Everyone says that! But it's fine! It really is! She died in labor and even though I was the one to kill her- it's fine! I didn't even fucking know her!" He spatted off. I stood there, shell shocked. It was the first time someone had yelled seemingly, directly at me. I knew he wasn't mad at me, but it felt like that. He was still upset with himself, he blamed himself. I knew that, but it still didn't help the tears that were threatening to spill over. _

_I'm such a baby, I remember thinking. And damn, if only I knew what was to come. _

"_Is, I'm sorry," he whispered taking me in his arms, "I'm not mad at you, I'm sorry." I just nodded. Chuckling a bit to lighten the mood. _

"_Would you like to meet my dad?" he questioned quietly, still hugging me. _

"_Yes," I replied almost too quickly. _

_I could hear the smile in his voice just a little bit. "Okay, lets go."_

_I don't remember the car ride over, we probably joked or something. Something simple, because it always was up until this point. Everything was calm and easy, nothing to be worried about, nothing to be scared of. It was just James and Is, and I thought I was in love with him. _

_We got to his house, it was just a normal suburban house, much like mine. Walking in, we were holding hands, looking so in love I remember hoping people were jealous. We walked in, and the first thing I remember was it reeked of smoke. Which was weird, James never smelled like smoke. This house smelled of stale tobacco._

"_James, is that you!?" I heard a bellowing voice boom out from somewhere close. _

"_I'm sorry," James whispered to me immediately, which I thought was weird. _

"_What?" I asked, very confused about the scene that was in front of me. _

"_Yeah dad, it's me, I want you to meet someone," James said, not as confident as he usually sounded. We started walking forward going out of the mud room, toward where the voice had come from. _

_We walked into his kitchen and I saw his dad for the first time. He wasn't what I expected at all... You could see some of James in him, but not much. If you could, it was faded by the bags under his eyes and the sunken cheek bones. _

"_Dad, this is my girlfriend, Bella," he said, his hand never leaving mine while his voice quivered. _

_His dad didn't say anything to me, just stared at me for a moment. _

"_It's very nice to meet you Mr-" _

"_Upstairs. Now." His dad growled at him, I almost wanted to flinch at the harshness of his tone, but I didn't dare move as James pulled his hand out of mine. His dad walked up the stairs. _

"_I'll be right back," he said, his voice hiding something from me, and I was already scared enough. _

"_James-" _

"_Stay here." He followed his father up the stairs, leaving me standing in the kitchen wondering what the hell was going on. I was scared, but I wasn't sure why, and I knew I didn't want James to go up those stairs. I sat there for two minutes before I head a loud bang from upstairs and I was tempted to go up, but the urgency in James' voice when he told me to stay put was too serious to test._

_I only waited a couple minutes after the bang before I footsteps were running down the stairs and flying past me. It was James and he was running out where we had just came from. I quickly followed, not caring if he didn't want me to follow, I sure as hell wasn't staying in his eery kitchen. _

_I ran out the garage where he was sitting, back against his car, shaking. I went and kneeled close to him, grabbing his hand. _

"_Hey what-" I stopped mid sentence looking at his face. There was a clear red mark, from a slap or punch. Some force that stopped me in my tracks. Shocked, inside I knew, this was not the first time. _

"_James..." I started but he just pulled me to him, clinging to me. _

_As if I was the only one keeping him alive. _

"Bella?" I heard Edwards voice pull me out of my trance. I was at my locker, putting my stuff away, not even realizing it.

"Oh, hi Edward," I replied, blinking a couple of times. I grabbed my books and closed my locker, ready to go to first hour.

"I'll walk you to class, if you don't mind?" Edward said cautiously. I stared at him confused as to why he'd want to do this, but replied with a simple,

"Sure." And so my day began, with Edward.

* * *

**A/N:** Sorry if I confused anyone, I erased some chapters and reworked them to make them all overall longer! So this was originally Chapter 10, but I've compiled them all into different chapters, etc, etc! Hope you enjoyed!!

**Please review! It's my 18th birthday today! :) **


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